After a month of silence.
I haven't taken much account of certain people who always leave me hanging. As a matter of fact, I think I never did. It's just last night when I realized I was actually getting into something really sensible. While I was reading Confessions of a Shopaholic
, suddenly went into a stare - the kind of thing you do when your mind is preoccupied. So there I was, lying in bed with the book placed somewhere beside my right thigh, just staring out of nowhere. It got me thinking about the things that cause me a lot of stress, those that are soon to be unbearable (I know sooner or later those kind of things would turn me into a sleepless zombie). The first thing that flashed through my mind was, of course, SCHOOL. School sucks. Super. I doubt if you'll even realize that you're already a transformed humanoid who no longer knows how to laugh (or even smile to that extent). Secondly, I thought about my social life. Sometimes I wish I was born a natural loner, someone who doesn't know how to socialize, someone who's not even worth talking to. The kind that never gets invited to parties, never gets to dance, never gets to sing... or even giggle. Err.. maybe I'm exaggerating a bit. Okay forget about that. But you see my point, don't you? I mean, maybe being a loner isn't so bad after all. LOL. Like that's ever going to happen to me. But sometimes I feel the need to be alone with myself, and no one else. Those are the times where you get to contemplate about the things that happened, currently happening, and those that're bound to happen.
Okay, I know I'm boring you. But do understand that I'm not in an enthusiastic mood at the moment so please bear with me. Or you can just click the nearest exit button somewhere on your screen.
Lastly, the situation that I'm in right now. I am in no mood to share what's been going on with my everyday life. But if you're badly curious then I'm happy to inform you that I'm just a text away. :) Anyway, getting back to the subject.. Come on! How can someone be so stupid? Okay, I was referring to myself. Want a clue? OK. Love. Stupid, stupid love. I'm too young to have these kind of problems about err.. love. Why couldn't I leave that feeling behind and just have a wonderful social life. Oh God. I'm a girl after all - and only human. I am created with emotions. BUT -- I was created with my brain placed higher than heart.
And so it's up to me to stop being so dumbfounded. Oh, the humor.
Oh, never mind. All these rantings won't do me any good, will it? I think not. But it
actually felt good - to be able to release all those emotions. It's no big, after all.